Working Artist

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Hi Everyone! It's February already and the winter chills are in the air. Winter in Berlin is like walking in a huge freezer, but it has its perks :)

During this time of the year, the colors of evening skies are breathtaking, and I always stop my feet to watch snowflakes fall under the street lamp at night. The brisk winter air seems to bring out a lot depth in the colors, I feel. 

 

It's my third year in Berlin now, and here I work as an artist. But at the same time, I hold a part time job in a kitchen couple times a week. Different people have different views on working as an artist and having another job, but for me I try to balance it out as best as I can. It's not always the easiest thing, but I learn a lot about myself through this process. Going out of the studio and doing something very different as a part time job gives me a good change of scenery. Working in the studio is a very egoistic procedure. So for a part time job, working in the kitchen and doing things to make others happy allows me to balance my ego in the society I live in. For me, finding a good balance is a challenging process. Depending on the the piece I'm working on, I sometimes need pure isolation. I find it very difficult sometimes to pull myself "in" and "out" of this spiral. However, I believe that it's important to be able to do this. Over the years, I've learned that pulling yourself "out" of it, is not exactly unproductive.

winter, berlin, subway, metro, fur, cold, hat, black and white, vintage
all geared up for winter

When I shut myself in the studio for a long period of time, it starts to gradually get to me. Don't get me wrong, I do like working alone in the studio, but I realized that overly doing it can make me get caught up in "myself". After all, it's you and your art piece in the studio. You discuss with it, battle with it and so on. But when it goes down the "bad relationship" road, I just need to take some time away from it. But this is easier said than done. When this happens, even when I leave the studio, I'm still thinking about it. So working outside, doing something completely different helps me to set my mind away. When I'm in the kitchen, I only think about how to do well in the kitchen so that we can end the day with happy customers. This has given me a good balance and I'm very lucky to be able to work with a great team there.


Once I take that "break", it creates a new flow inside, and I can go back to the piece with a new attitude, with more energy. I realized that this small "break" is more productive if you look at it in the long run. In the past, I've pushed myself to do more when I was stuck in a rut. Looking back at it, I feel that I was scared to accept the fact that "I was stuck in a rut". So I kept pushing and pushing, and it just kept becoming worse. I knew it in my head, but couldn't fully understand it from the heart. I wasn't actually feeling it. Over time, it has gotten a lot better. I still have times when I get caught up in my own work, but I feel like I have a better understanding of the whole process now. Art is something I want to live with all my life. I try to keep a good relationship and balance with it because it's important to me. 

 

xA

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